tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-201188432024-03-19T00:15:07.813-04:00El Zángano Azul...is The Blue DroneEl Zángano Azulhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03683664765367973291noreply@blogger.comBlogger93125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-20118843.post-67069831432909533192008-03-09T17:22:00.008-04:002008-03-09T23:36:26.614-04:00Oh no...<a href="http://www.cnn.com/ELECTION/2008/primaries/results/scorecard/#D" target="_self">This thing</a> should have been over last Tuesday! Does this mean that I have to take 3 more months of this absurd circus? Will Pennsylvania decide? <a href="http://blog.washingtonpost.com/fact-checker/2008/02/will_puerto_rico_decide_everyt.html" target="_self">Will Puerto Rico</a>, the Masons, the elves, or the unicorns decide? All this could have been avoided if they had hired the right political consultants. No Axelrod, no Penn, no Solis-Doyle!!! They needed somebody with the iron will and determination to crush the opposition. They needed Vladimir Vladimirovich Putin. He can still help, he's <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Russian_presidential_election,_2008" target="_self">no longer</a> President of Russia, or so I'm told.<br />This is how it should have played out:<br /><br />At a fundraising Christmas ball...<br />-Oh Mr. and Mrs. Zavabski, you make such lovely couple, and you have made many contribution to campaign. I think you should kiss under mistletoe and I take picture.<br />-But...that's an anvil hanging from a rope.<br />-Nyet, that is not anvil! That is Russian mistletoe, in honor of factory workers who died in Great Patriotic War.<br />-Uhm, ok.<br />------<br />-I believe we must go on fact finding mission in Afghanistan. Do not mind <a href="http://www.dkimages.com/discover/previews/813/50114160.JPG" target="_self">signs with skull</a> on side of road...they are Afghan Halloween adornments.<br />----<br />-Oh, Ms. Miller our loyal treasurer...you look hungry. Here, have some <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Alexander_Litvinenko_poisoning#Illness_and_poisoning" target="_self">sushi.</a><br />----<br />-Mrs. Chavez, I seem to have forgotten promotional material in car...yes, it is there <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Politkovskaya#Assassination" target="_self">in dark alley</a>.<br />---<br />-Mr. Johnson, our loyal Public Relations Officer...have you had our delicious borscht? You look like you need <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Yuschenko#Dioxin_poisoning" target="_self">some nourishment</a>.<br />---<br />-In order to organize and plan strategy better, I suggest retreat in beautiful dacha I have in <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Tyumen" target="_self">Tyumen</a>. When you are there, please ask for some <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Gulag" target="_self">Gulag</a>; it is beautiful Russian dish.<br /><br />It would have been so easy...But now it may be too late. Whatever happens, better get used to these two words: President McCain*.<br /><br /><br /><br />*I know, it hurts.El Zángano Azulhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03683664765367973291noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-20118843.post-46107804385783661922008-03-04T14:46:00.007-05:002008-03-04T15:00:44.129-05:00They should make a movie...Apparently there are some fans of retro-1970's Automobile Destruction B-movies in the District. Now if they could only get in touch with a good director, it would probably make for a much better movie than Tarantino's coke-addled rant, pastiche borefest of a movie called Death-Proof.<br /><div><div><span style="font-size:85%;">'In the first incident, at Phelps Place and California Street NW, the attacker slashed a cabdriver's tires and drove a half-block away, police said. He then put his vehicle in reverse and hit the driver "at a high rate of speed," causing him to be "lifted into the air," according to the police report. The cabbie suffered broken ribs, police said.' </span></div><span style="font-size:85%;"><br /><div>"We're calling him 'the Rogue Cabdriver,' " said D.C. Assistant Police Chief Diane Groomes. "It appears that he wants his competition out of the city." </div><br /><div></span>More at the <a href="http://www.washingtonpost.com/wp-dyn/content/article/2008/03/02/AR2008030201984.html" target="_self">WaPo</a></div><br /><div>"Rogue Cabdriver" Hmmm...Has a sweet ring to it. <a href="http://www.imdb.com/name/nm0375494/bio" target="_self">Monte Hellman</a> could direct; if <a href="http://www.imdb.com/name/nm0001603/bio" target="_self">Peckinpah</a> or <a href="http://www.imdb.com/name/nm0001239/" target="_self">Frankenheimer</a> were still alive they would have been perfect.<br /><br /></div><div><img id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5173976148468137714" style="DISPLAY: block; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; CURSOR: hand; TEXT-ALIGN: center" alt="" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjGwSKE-y4TThWZcKZk2v3_8e-mTQRD4BNuAD87hsFc8jxWK1icaRNh2nlk1vaMSi1O7YE7FZFh0FKYnJAZL7tycTdHLhev2OUgCSXW3QLub0fmr-NZ2vpW80DLOIvn5iGNbx39Fw/s400/barracuda.jpg" border="0" /></div><br /><div>The real Rogue Cabdriver's white Crown Victoria would be replaced by a 1970 Plymouth Barracuda, and the climax of the movie would involve a demolition derby-style duel with the DC cabbies' one and only true hero...</div><br /><img id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5173976479180619522" style="DISPLAY: block; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; CURSOR: hand; TEXT-ALIGN: center" alt="" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh3zVZsPKfr4PMdWcmza9wa0wT3VFbTj-sHjMafgOsh0wCrpaU9xK32cABDuUXN6h5eH8fSgi4WNlyF2vht0dzat5qMqt6b_m_m97_Yj2MfM14DMmc-kuEcQhEtdI0bMPrsrDtGjQ/s400/dcab.jpg" border="0" /><br /><div>Heck! Let's just make it "D.C. Cab II -Attack of the Rogue Cabdriver Fool".</div></div>El Zángano Azulhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03683664765367973291noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-20118843.post-83231138638831465052008-02-26T11:19:00.006-05:002008-02-26T17:59:39.609-05:00A Conspiracy?<div align="left">As African Union troops-with logistical support from France-begins its military offensive to remove the president of <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Anjouan" target="_self">The Republic of Anjouan</a>, new details have emerged suggesting that the final objectives of this operation may not be the re-establishment of the rule of law or democracy in this island nation.<br /></div><br /><div align="left">The Republic of Anjouan was formerly part of the <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Union_of_Comoros" target="_self">The Comoros Islands</a> ,whose main claim to fame was being close to <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Image:Flag_of_Mozambique.svg" target="_self">the country with the most badass flag</a>, and it became independent since 1997. Its relations with the Union of the Comoros and its president, <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ahmed_Abdallah_Mohamed_Sambi" target="_self">Ahmed Abdalla Mohamed Sambi</a>, have steadily deteriorated and reached a headway this year. Intelligence insiders have suggested; however, that the main goal of this operation may very well be securing the supply of <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ylang_ylang" target="_self">Ylang Ylang</a> oil, an ingredient used in most perfumes(Anjouan is the World's primary supplier).<br /><br /><img id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5171381793058011954" style="DISPLAY: block; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; CURSOR: hand; TEXT-ALIGN: center" alt="" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjspxOJL-7rURMvxpkxutzb1dWwBrtA8v3swzEUA4Unin6s3HwqyWmcmhXE-fcqdW8kITesrIeo8nbLbo9Efm4yoB93zkf3iq_ECyvw29sQ3vo-1BA2JyMjDc4LemKou-eDmK416A/s400/bacar.jpg" border="0" /></div><br /><div align="left"><span style="font-size:78%;">Anjouan's dapper, fragrant President</span><br /><br />"We know that the multinational perfume corporations are the ones who are pushing for this imperialist aggression, but this will not stand," said Anjouan President <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Mohamed_Bacar" target="_self">Mohamed Bacar</a> , and added that "May Allah cut the heads of the Estée Lauder, Chanel Hydra! We will fight them on the beaches, we will fight them in the mountains; they shall not resist our scented hand-grenades, our perfumed arrows, they shall inhale the sweet sweet smell of our patrimony, our Ylang-Ylang, and their will shall come undone, Inshallah!!! We shall be victorious."<br /></div><br />When reached for comment, a spokesperson for the European Perfumists Association denied these allegations, "It is ludicrous to suggest that we would invade or support the invasion of a country for any oil."<br /><br /><br />Military analysts have suggested that the African Union troops may have contracted the services of <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Executive_Outcomes" target="_self">Executive Outcomes</a>, a mercenary company based in South Africa, in order to counteract the "Ylang-Ylang" advantage of the Anjouan defense forces. "The introduction of company-sized <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Civet" target="_self">Civet</a> combat units and their musky capabilities may very well shift the balance of power in the theatre of operations," said the military expert Jon Van Stoergen.<br /><br /><img id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5171382218259774274" style="DISPLAY: block; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; CURSOR: hand; TEXT-ALIGN: center" alt="" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgvvb-EmD48rDFDRKrBdavE36wp_9s53J8uC0vtByiNCJWZnKwEFgUUVx9dWCj4sHzBxizdqYx9KZd9b6qvle88KI0BFUI4VUKDJ4ZIU_N6QNurcbd9v3tK4NfzG_fLInscRp1e-Q/s400/Civets.jpg" border="0" /> <span style="font-size:78%;">Mercenary civets on routine patrol in Tanzania</span><br /><br /><br />"Let them come," Bacar retorted. "Their flea ridden, urine-reeking oversized rats will be no match for our ambrosial, aromatic, and delectably delicious determination. Long live a free odoriferous Anjouan!"<br /><br /><br /><br />Anjouan, with a population of 634,000, has suffered 19 beautifully scented coups since 1975.El Zángano Azulhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03683664765367973291noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-20118843.post-27362716934699135172008-02-25T11:18:00.008-05:002008-02-25T14:19:22.175-05:00But is he Good for Anything?Again, there are people asking: <a href="http://www.newsweek.com/id/114723">Is Obama good for the Jews?</a> I don't think he will be that much different from the Clintons, Bush or McCain regarding the Israeli-Palestinian issue if he finally becomes President. Certain Jewish groups have accused him on not being sufficiently supportive of Israel, and the way some see him-erroneously mind you-, if he keeps his so called "moderate" stance, he will scare away potential jewish donors, and the Republicans will pounce on him at the very least as weak, or at the very worst as a terrorist appeaser.<br />But let's see what this accredited Fatah member has said:<br /><br /><a href="http://blogs.suntimes.com/sweet/2007/03/obamas_aipac_speech_text_as_pr.html">On march 2, 2007:</a><br /><br /><span style="font-size:85%;">"...we must preserve our total commitment toour unique defense relationship with Israel by fully funding military assistance and continuing work on the Arrow and related missile defense programs. This would help Israel maintain its military edge and deter andrepel attacks from as far as Tehran and as close as Gaza. Andwhen Israel is attacked, we must stand up for Israel’s legitimate rightto defend itself. Last summer, Hezbollah attacked Israel. By usingLebanon as an outpost for terrorism, and innocent people as shields, Hezbollah has also engulfed that entire nation in violence and conflict,and threatened the fledgling movement for democracy there. "<br /></span><br />Granted, he did put more pressure on Israel to achieve a diplomatic solution, but again, this is no different from what previous administrations have tried, or said to have tried.<br /><br /><span style="font-size:85%;">"But in the end, we also know that we should never seek to dictate what isbest for the Israelis and their security interests. No Israeli PrimeMinister should ever feel dragged to or blocked from the negotiating table by the United States."<br /></span><br />Right....pretty please...make peace! We'll just watch from over here...<br /><br />Ok, so he didn't go to rallies supporting the Israeli air campaign and land incursion into Lebanon in 2006 <a href="http://www.nytimes.com/2006/07/18/nyregion/18hillary.html">as Hillary did</a>, but he did <a href="http://www.jewishvirtuallibrary.org/jsource/US-Israel/SenRes534.html">vote</a> to support it. And he didn't support the Iraq War vote, which was endorsed by the Israeli Far-right. But in many fundamental issues, he did not stray too far away <a href="http://www.commondreams.org/archive/2008/01/11/6312/">from the mainstream</a>.<br /><br />But you know what? Right now I don't really care if Obama is good for the Jews, the Surinamese, or the Hobbits. The real question is: Is Obama good for the Flu? Because I could really use some Luo Tribesman, "Muslimist", or native Hawaiian remedy right now to relieve my throbbing headache and congested, mucus ridden lungs . And for the record, we actually found out who obama really is NOT good for: Mariachi Bands.<br /><br /><br /><br /><embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/0fd-MVU4vtU&rel=" width="425" height="355" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" wmode="transparent"></embed><br /><br /><br />Jesús!!!!El Zángano Azulhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03683664765367973291noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-20118843.post-1160541541574216992006-10-11T00:02:00.000-04:002006-10-11T10:37:37.943-04:00Crap!-You should go out if it's so nice, go out for a walk.<br />-Yes, I think I should...I'll leave now!<br /><br />And so the events were set in motion for one of the most shattering humiliations suffered by The Blue Drone. I set upon what was supposed to be a leisurely holiday stroll. I crossed 16th Street, book bag slung over my shoulder, feeling quite at ease and enjoying the pleasant 70 degree temperature, and then...it happened.<br />Something hit my forehead, it felt warm, soft and mushy and started trickling down my glasses and down my tender blue cheek. No, this cannot be...even as I saw my vision blurred by a greenish ooze, like when horror movie titles start trickling blood, except this wasn't blood. I had been shat on by a bird...on my face.<br /><br /><p><img style="DISPLAY: block; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; CURSOR: hand; TEXT-ALIGN: center" alt="" src="http://photos1.blogger.com/blogger/2515/2005/400/caca%20de%20pajaro1.jpg" border="0" /><br />There were many passersby, and I had to scramble and find a leaf to clean my precious precious visage, I could see them laugh at me, mock me for a tragic event that in no way I could have prevented. Just a sick sick joke that some godforsaken Starling or Sparrow decided to play on me.<br />Some say it is good luck to be shat on by a bird. I can see a valid point in this, since if you are defecated on...in public, well...nothing could be more ignoble, except maybe being shat on by an elephant or shit-sprayed by a hippo, which reminds me to be more careful next time I go to the zoo. And I suppose that since birds have <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Cloaca">cloacas</a> it serves as double the humiliation...being shat and peed on at the same time. </p><p>Now, this is where I would normally start adding historical references like "The Greeks thought that bird droppings represented a so-so harvest" or "The Babylonians said that if a bird defecated on you face, it meant that you were a cuckold" and so forth. Except, I didn't find any historical references to bird droppings and luck. What I DID find instead were countless weblog entries detailing "being pooped on by a bird" experiences...and it didn't make me feel special or original...at all. Goddammit I was pooped on!!! I'm special!!! I am!! I really am!!! Am I? Not really. </p><p>So the moral of the story is this: </p><p>1. It is sometimes better to stay indoors, even if its "really nice" outside.</p><p>2. You are not special...you might think you are, but you are NOT.</p><p>3. There is no relation between bird droppings and luck, and whoever came up with that is full of (bird)shit!*</p><p>*<span style="font-size:85%;">This closing line was probably used by about 300,742 "shat on by a bird" weblog entries...DAMN YOU INTERNET!!!!</span></p><p></p><p></p>El Zángano Azulhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03683664765367973291noreply@blogger.com7tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-20118843.post-1160150387241748222006-10-06T11:52:00.000-04:002006-10-06T12:00:51.553-04:00My my...What a big head you have, errr...had! !<br /><img style="DISPLAY: block; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; CURSOR: hand; TEXT-ALIGN: center" alt="" src="http://photos1.blogger.com/blogger/2515/2005/400/cabezon.jpg" border="0" /> Is it just pent-up guilt for owing your fortune to your dad's use of Nazi slave labor? Feh! <a href="http://news.yahoo.com/s/ap/20061006/ap_on_re_eu/obit_flick;_ylt=AmPNyg2R2XWqO6MFfS2bbhlw24cA;_ylu=X3oDMTA5aHJvMDdwBHNlYwN5bmNhdA--">You dead anyway</a>...But I cant help thinking of... <p></p><p align="center"><img style="DISPLAY: block; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; CURSOR: hand; TEXT-ALIGN: center" alt="" src="http://photos1.blogger.com/blogger/2515/2005/320/cabezoncomic.jpg" border="0" />this guy when I see your picture.</p>El Zángano Azulhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03683664765367973291noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-20118843.post-1160060443298261712006-10-05T10:56:00.000-04:002006-10-05T11:52:32.193-04:00The Blue Drone Asks:<a href="http://photos1.blogger.com/blogger/2515/2005/1600/DSCF1612.jpg"><img style="DISPLAY: block; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; CURSOR: hand; TEXT-ALIGN: center" alt="" src="http://photos1.blogger.com/blogger/2515/2005/400/DSCF1612.jpg" border="0" /></a> I had a vague idea of what this meant when I started...Now I'm not so sure. Could you help me come up with a caption?El Zángano Azulhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03683664765367973291noreply@blogger.com5tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-20118843.post-1159817760305799452006-10-02T15:21:00.000-04:002006-10-02T15:46:48.446-04:00The Blue Drone Lives In A Folly...No, I'm not at all referring to:<br /><span style="font-size:85%;">1. A lack of good sense, understanding, or foresight.<br />2. An act or instance of foolishness: "regretted the follies of his youth. "<br />3. A costly undertaking having an absurd or ruinous outcome.<br /></span><br />Instead, I refer to <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Folly">this folly</a>:<br /><br /><span style="font-size:85%;">Architecture. a whimsical or extravagant structure built to serve as a conversation piece, lend interest to a view, commemorate a person or event, etc.: found esp. in England in the 18th century.<br /></span><br /><br /><p><img style="DISPLAY: block; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; CURSOR: hand; TEXT-ALIGN: center" alt="" src="http://photos1.blogger.com/blogger/2515/2005/320/follyzangano.jpg" border="0" />Hey look at me!!! I'm the King Of The Folly!!! Mwahahahaha! It should be noted that my folly includes an interior pool with capybaras, an apiary for my, ahem... pleasure, and a room with gigantic tapestries...made of bacon, MmmmMmm Baacoonn!</p><p>Other notable follies <a href="http://homepage.ntlworld.com/follies/">here</a>, but mine is better. </p><p>Any recommendations on how to further fix up my folly?<br /></p>El Zángano Azulhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03683664765367973291noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-20118843.post-1159470037592683582006-09-28T14:31:00.000-04:002006-09-28T15:15:53.113-04:00The Blue Drone Confesses...A worker bee friend of mine recently remarked about my musical tastes: "I bet all you listen to is Pansy-Ass rock!". I was taken aback by the comment. How could that be? I like music that rocks...hard, preferably at ear-splitting decibel levels. I thought long and hard on this, until I realized that maybe, just maybe...my friend could be right.<br />So, I confess, yes...I like Pansy-Ass rock...and in order to revel in my Pansy-Ass Rockiness I will post not one, but three videos from a <a href="http://www.allmusic.com/cg/amg.dll?p=amg&sql=11:zq5ibkd9hakv~T1">band</a> that may be a quintessential example of said genre:<br /><embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/0KISXwh45nY" width="425" height="350" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" wmode="transparent"></embed><br />"Something 4 the Weekend"<br /><br /><embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/0ss9zBGsGLo" width="425" height="350" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" wmode="transparent"></embed><br />"If You Don't Want me to Destroy You"<br /><embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/WnkkbpSby74" width="425" height="350" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" wmode="transparent"></embed><br />"Lazer Beam"<br /><br />The Blue Drone: Pansy-Ass Rocker...possibly even a communist!<br /><br /><br /><img style="DISPLAY: block; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; CURSOR: hand; TEXT-ALIGN: center" alt="" src="http://photos1.blogger.com/blogger/2515/2005/400/ZanganoAzulcommie.jpg" border="0" />El Zángano Azulhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03683664765367973291noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-20118843.post-1159376892831615512006-09-27T13:00:00.002-04:002006-09-27T15:26:27.753-04:00The Blue Drone Goes Oink!<div align="center"><br /></div><a href="http://photos1.blogger.com/blogger/2515/2005/1600/panfleto-cerdo.jpg"><img style="DISPLAY: block; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; CURSOR: hand; TEXT-ALIGN: center" alt="" src="http://photos1.blogger.com/blogger/2515/2005/400/panfleto-cerdo.jpg" border="0" /> <p align="center"></a>I knew it all along... </p><p><img style="DISPLAY: block; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; CURSOR: hand; TEXT-ALIGN: center" alt="" src="http://photos1.blogger.com/blogger/2515/2005/400/cerdosuerte.jpg" border="0" /></p><p>Who's a cute little piggy? Oh, you are! </p><p>Who's the prettiest most adorable lucky piggy? You are you are!!Oh look at you so precious and pink with your cute little hooves! awww.</p><p>Who's the bestest...tastiest piggy? You are! CHOMP! </p><p><img style="DISPLAY: block; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; CURSOR: hand; TEXT-ALIGN: center" alt="" src="http://photos1.blogger.com/blogger/2515/2005/400/varahi.jpg" border="0" /></p><p></p><p>Oh, the <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Pig">pig</a>... In Buddhist tradion it sometimes represents the deity called 'Varahi', who is: </p><p><span style="font-size:85%;">The boar-faced goddess who protects Newari (Nepalese) temples and buildings, Varahi or Barahi, refers to any of 4 sow deities who preside over Kathmandu Valley, Nepal. They guard the gates of the city-as-mandala.</span></p><p>In Egypt: </p><p><span style="font-size:85%;">-Nuut, the Egyptian goddess of the night, Mother of Stars, was sometimes depicted on amulets as a sow suckling her piglets. </span></p><p>In Greece: </p><p><span style="font-size:85%;">Swine were sacred to </span><a name="Demeter"><span style="font-size:85%;">Demeter</span></a><span style="font-size:85%;">, goddess of the earth's fertility, who was the mother of Persephone, queen of the underworld. In autumn, during the rites of Thesmophoria, her devotees drove a herd of swine into a labyrinthine cave. Later, they would return to see if the deity had accepted this offering by examining the condition of any pig carcasses that might remain. </span></p><p>The pig truly is a <a href="http://www.thesimpsonsquotes.com/quotes/200.html">wonderful, magical animal!</a> Strong, powerful, noble, highly intelligent, harbringer of good luck, and also...</p><p></p><p><img style="DISPLAY: block; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; CURSOR: hand; TEXT-ALIGN: center" alt="" src="http://photos1.blogger.com/blogger/2515/2005/400/chuletas.jpg" border="0" /></p><p align="center">Quite delicious!!! Ich muss Schwein essen!!!</p><p></p>El Zángano Azulhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03683664765367973291noreply@blogger.com12tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-20118843.post-1159196638351739552006-09-25T10:55:00.000-04:002006-09-25T11:03:58.390-04:00The Blue Drone presents: Gratuitous Mid-Morning Samurai Violence Starring Toshiro Mifune.<p><embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/bnaq2JLaJuA" width="425" height="350" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" wmode="transparent"></embed></p><p>Because I'm feeling un-original this morning....</p>El Zángano Azulhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03683664765367973291noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-20118843.post-1158765023750424612006-09-20T10:30:00.000-04:002006-09-20T11:45:40.376-04:00The Blue Drone Asks:<a href="http://photos1.blogger.com/blogger/2515/2005/1600/space.jpg"><img style="DISPLAY: block; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; CURSOR: hand; TEXT-ALIGN: center" alt="" src="http://photos1.blogger.com/blogger/2515/2005/320/space.jpg" border="0" /></a>What the hell is going on in Space?!<br /><br /><a href="http://www.space.com/missionlaunches/060919_sts115_landingdelay.html"><span style="font-size:85%;"><strong>Atlantis Landing Delayed After Mystery Object Spotted</strong></span></a><span style="font-size:85%;"><br />CAPE CANAVERAL, Fla. – NASA </span><a href="http://www.space.com/space-shuttle/"><span style="font-size:85%;">shuttle</span></a><span style="font-size:85%;"> managers are deciding whether simple camera views, a third heat shield survey or possibly even a spacewalk may be required to address a mystery object near the space shuttle Atlantis that has already delayed the spacecraft’s planned Wednesday landing.<br /></span><br />Our team of expert scientists at Blue Drone headquarters have studied these objects and have concluded that the first one...<br /><br /><a href="http://photos1.blogger.com/blogger/2515/2005/1600/shimstock.0.jpg"><img style="CURSOR: hand" alt="" src="http://photos1.blogger.com/blogger/2515/2005/320/shimstock.0.jpg" border="0" /></a> <a href="http://photos1.blogger.com/blogger/2515/2005/1600/take%205.jpg"><img style="CURSOR: hand" alt="" src="http://photos1.blogger.com/blogger/2515/2005/320/take%205.jpg" border="0" /></a><br /><br />is only an improperly discarded "Take 5" candy wrapper, wedged between the tiles by NASA contractor in Cape Canaveral. Either that or a space slug, that in any case will safely be incinerated upon reentry without any further damage to the insulation tiles, unless it's a Super Killer Space Slug of World Destruction...then we will all be doomed.<br /><br />The second object is a bit harder to identify:<br /><br /><img style="DISPLAY: block; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; CURSOR: hand; TEXT-ALIGN: center" alt="" src="http://photos1.blogger.com/blogger/2515/2005/400/mystobj2.jpg" border="0" />Our experts have yet to agree on an explanation as to what exactly this is. Some say it's a floating see-through skirt ejected from the Russian Zvezda Module after some serious partying with a group of Bolshoi ballerinas flown in an unscheduled <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Vostok_rocket">Vostok</a> launch. Others say its a Super Killer Giant Space Jellyfish-like creature working in conjuction with the Super Killer Space Slug attached to the Shuttle. If that is the case then we will truly be royally screwed.<br /><br />Not that it will matter to the Russians in the Zvezda Module:<br /><br /><a href="http://www.space.com/missionlaunches/060918_iss_smoke.html"><span style="font-size:85%;"><strong>Space Station Crew Detects Smoke-like Smell in Russian Segment</strong></span></a><span style="font-size:85%;"><strong> </strong></span><br /><span style="font-size:85%;">CAPE CANAVERAL, Fla. – A mild toxic leak and a smoke-like smell aboard the </span><a href="http://www.space.com/internationalspacestation/"><span style="font-size:85%;">International Space Station</span></a><span style="font-size:85%;"> (ISS) prompted an afternoon scare for three astronauts aboard the orbital laboratory, mission managers said Monday.</span><br /><br />Smoke like smell eh...<br /><br /><span style="font-size:85%;">“Everything is good, everything is fine,” Expedition 13 </span><a href="http://www.space.com/missionlaunches/060414_exp13_profiles.html"><span style="font-size:85%;">commander Pavel Vinogradov</span></a><span style="font-size:85%;"> told Russian ISS mission controllers in Moscow, adding that he had contained the apparent leak in a rubber bag.</span><br /><br />Yeah, of course everything is fine when your brain is fried on some primo ganja...Hmm, is that how you make a bong in zero gravity? Our sources obtained an unedited clip of the transmission and one could faintly hear some reggae music in the background, along with some giggling. Commander Vinogradov was also heard saying: "Когда пица приходит?"... which is Russian for "When's the Pizza coming?" <br /><br /><span style="font-size:85%;">“I believe that the rubber seal produced that odor,” Vinogradov said, adding that the Elektron appeared to stop leaking after he shut it off.</span><br /><br />You're not fooling anyone Vinogradov!El Zángano Azulhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03683664765367973291noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-20118843.post-1158091728516413962006-09-12T15:47:00.000-04:002006-09-12T19:09:40.686-04:00Why?I sometimes just don't understand human beings....<br /><br /><a href="http://news.yahoo.com/s/ap/20060912/ap_on_re_au_an/crocodile_hunter_stingray_killings"><strong>10 stingrays killed since Irwin's death</strong></a><br /><span style="font-size:85%;">SYDNEY, Australia - At least 10 stingrays have been killed since "Crocodile Hunter" Steve Irwin was fatally injured by one of the fish, an official said Tuesday, prompting a spokesman for the late TV star's animal charity to urge people not take revenge on the animals.<br />Irwin died last week after a stingray barb pierced his chest as he recorded a show off the Great Barrier Reef.<br />Stingray bodies since have been discovered on two beaches in Queensland state on Australia's eastern coast. Two were discovered Tuesday with their tails lopped off, state fisheries department official Wayne Sumpton said.<br />Sumpton said fishermen who inadvertently catch the diamond-shaped rays sometimes cut off their tails to avoid being stung, but the practice was uncommon. Stingrays often are caught in fishing nets by mistake and should be returned to the sea, Sumpton said</span>.<br /><br />Now explain to me what purpose does this serve? Was this guy so popular in Australia to impel people to start killing stingrays? I always thought Australians were strange, but this is downright stoopid.<br />I didn't want to comment on this guy's death anyway. His death was tragic, yes, but something in me also tells me that the odds just caught up with him, and in fact, he reminds me a little bit of <a href="http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0427312/">this guy</a>.<br />Then again, as eccentric entertainers go, he was quite harmless, except when he dangled his baby son in front of a crocodile, and he did at least encourage learning about nature.<br />Now all this talk about Stingrays and Manta Rays brought back a song to my head, The Blue Drone sometimes being Mr. Literal Drone, and I'd like to play it as an eulogy of sorts to the Crocodile Dude...to the Manta Rays. It doesn't matter...take a pick, what is certain is that it's rockin'.<br /><br /><p align="center"><iframe src="http://www.castpost.com/Lib/playm1.php?filename=05 Manta Ray.mp3&url=http://zanganoazul.castpost.com/" frameborder="0" width="250" scrolling="no" height="40"></iframe></p><br /><p align="center"></p>El Zángano Azulhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03683664765367973291noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-20118843.post-1158087957805724182006-09-12T14:58:00.000-04:002006-09-12T15:05:57.823-04:00Tsk Tsk...<a href="http://photos1.blogger.com/blogger/2515/2005/1600/spacewalk.jpg"><img style="DISPLAY: block; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; CURSOR: hand; TEXT-ALIGN: center" alt="" src="http://photos1.blogger.com/blogger/2515/2005/320/spacewalk.jpg" border="0" /></a><br />Looks like somebody wasn't following the step by step instructions:<br /><br /><a href="http://news.yahoo.com/s/ap/20060912/ap_on_sc/space_shuttle"><strong>Astronauts lose bolt during spacewalk</strong></a><strong> </strong><br /><span style="font-size:85%;">CAPE CANAVERAL, Fla. - Spacewalking astronauts worried they have may have gummed up a successful job connecting an addition to the international space station Tuesday when a bolt, spring and washer floated free. </span><br /><span style="font-size:85%;">Astronaut Joe Tanner was working with the bolt when it sprang loose, floated over the head of Heidemarie Stefanyshyn-Piper and skittered across the 17 1/2-ton box-like truss that they were hooking up.</span><br /><span style="font-size:85%;"></span><br />Now I wonder what this guy would have said about this:<br /><span style="font-size:85%;"></span><br /><img style="DISPLAY: block; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; CURSOR: hand; TEXT-ALIGN: center" alt="" src="http://photos1.blogger.com/blogger/2515/2005/400/bob%20vila-mod.jpg" border="0" /><br />"Never let a <a href="http://www.jsc.nasa.gov/Bios/htmlbios/tanner.html">mechanical engineer</a> do a handyman's job!"El Zángano Azulhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03683664765367973291noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-20118843.post-1157665856224419042006-09-07T17:28:00.000-04:002006-09-07T17:58:43.496-04:00The Blue Drone Asks: What does this all mean?<a href="http://photos1.blogger.com/blogger/2515/2005/1600/lombriz.jpg"><img style="CURSOR: hand" height="157" alt="" src="http://photos1.blogger.com/blogger/2515/2005/200/lombriz.jpg" width="200" border="0" /></a> <a href="http://photos1.blogger.com/blogger/2515/2005/1600/pollo%20cru.jpg"><img style="CURSOR: hand" alt="" src="http://photos1.blogger.com/blogger/2515/2005/200/pollo%20cru.jpg" border="0" /></a><a href="http://photos1.blogger.com/blogger/2515/2005/1600/Pollo.jpg"></a><br /><a href="http://photos1.blogger.com/blogger/2515/2005/1600/ba??era.jpg"><img style="CURSOR: hand" height="200" alt="" src="http://photos1.blogger.com/blogger/2515/2005/200/ba%3F%3Fera.jpg" width="187" border="0" /></a><br /><br />1. I am walking on a sidewalk, a very wide sidewalk in a non-descript big city. It is cloudy, it has rained. I chat with a friend as we walk nonchalantly and I notice that the sidewalk is littered with thousands and thousands of wriggling earthworms. We start to tread carefully so as not to step on them, we get closer to the storefronts. Near one of the windows there is a heated grill, similar to a space heater. The Earthworms that have wandered close to the grill are withered and all dried up. We keep walking carefully. A chicken, just like the one in the picture above, starts moving...dragging itself along the sidewalk. All of a sudden a stranger, a girl, steps on it and squishes it, muttering something about saving the animal. End.<br />2. I am cleaning the bathtub. I apply a cleaning solution and start scrubbing. I scrub and scrub and scrub some more. Yet the bathtub remains dirty. I keep scrubbing and scrubbing and cleaning and water starts to accumulate. The bathtub is still dirty. I scrub and scrub until all the paint, porcelain, and metal are gone, revealing some underlying fiberglass-like material. It starts to soak up all the water and begins to bulge. End.<br /><br />I was going to ask Josef Von Teufel about these two, but he's a hopeless charlatan and a silly man, so I decided to ask the <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Rapid_eye_movement">Wikipedia</a> instead.<br /><br /><span style="font-size:85%;">Rapid eye movement (REM) sleep is the stage of </span><a title="Sleep" href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Sleep"><span style="font-size:85%;">sleep</span></a><span style="font-size:85%;"> characterized by rapid </span><a title="Eye movements" href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Eye_movements"><span style="font-size:85%;">movements of the eyes</span></a><span style="font-size:85%;">. During this stage, the activity of the </span><a title="Brain" href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Brain"><span style="font-size:85%;">brain</span></a><span style="font-size:85%;">'s </span><a title="Neuron" href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Neuron"><span style="font-size:85%;">neurons</span></a><span style="font-size:85%;"> is quite similar to that during waking hours; for this reason, the phenomenon is often called paradoxical sleep. Most of the vividly recalled </span><a title="Dream" href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Dream"><span style="font-size:85%;">dreams</span></a><span style="font-size:85%;"> occur during REM sleep. It is the lightest form of sleep, and people awakened during REM usually feel alert and refreshed.</span><br /><span style="font-size:85%;">The function of REM sleep is not well understood; several theories have been advanced.<br />According to one theory, certain </span><a title="Memory" href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Memory"><span style="font-size:85%;">memories</span></a><span style="font-size:85%;"> are consolidated during REM sleep. Numerous studies have suggested that REM sleep is important for consolidation of procedural and spatial memories. (</span><a title="Slow-wave sleep" href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Slow-wave_sleep"><span style="font-size:85%;">Slow-wave sleep</span></a><span style="font-size:85%;">, part of non-REM sleep, appears to be important for declarative memories.) </span><br /><p>Any other suggestions are welcome...</p><p><br /></p>El Zángano Azulhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03683664765367973291noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-20118843.post-1157660018467793932006-09-07T15:01:00.000-04:002006-09-07T16:18:06.373-04:00The Blue Drone checks the pulse of the nation...realizes there isn't any.I was browsing through 'Yahoo News' and noticed that I am surrounded by idiots: Here are the <a href="http://news.yahoo.com/i/964/0">'Most e-mailed'</a> news. Anger arose within me before I realized that it all fits with my master plan, as it is easier to control dimwits.<br /><br />In other news, today's prize for most blatant promotion of disingenuous theory based on bad historical/scientific analogy goes to this article:<br /><a href="http://news.yahoo.com/s/afp/20060907/sc_afp/britainclimateenvironmentwarming_060907164414"><strong>Climate change was once boost, not threat to civilization: scientist</strong></a><strong><br /></strong><span style="font-size:85%;">LONDON (AFP) - Severe climate change thousands of years ago may have been a boost to civilization rather than the danger it appears to pose today, a British scientist said.<br />Between 4,000 and 6,000 years ago, natural fluctuations in the Earth's orbit weakened the monsoon rains and brought a more arid climate, the University of East Anglia's Nick Brooks told a science festival in Norwich, eastern England.<br />The seeds for the civilizations in Egypt, Iraq, South Asia, China and northern South America were sown when hunter-gatherer people then gravitated to the remaining water sources and settled in stable communities, he said Thursday.<br />His view contradicts that of many experts who believe civilization resulted from a transition from a harsh, unpredictable climate during the last ice age, to a more clement and stable environment 10,000 years ago.</span><br /><br />Taking the theory at face value, the massive climate change provoked by the giant asteroid that wiped out the dinosaurs(just a theory as well) was also beneficial, because it eventually led to the further development of mammalian species. So, following that line of thinking, wouldn't we all benefit by a a friendly visit from a giant asteroid or more cataclismic events?<br />The article also fails to point out the fact that what took place 6,000 years ago was 'natural' climate change, not change induced by humans. Now, I will not get into the argument regarding what makes a natural event "natural", as I am aware that humans are not alien entities on the planet, but the article is written in such a way that suggests: "Hey, climate change is actually good so, don't worry about the scaremongers and hysterics, had it not been for it we wouldn't have the Great Pyramid of Giza, who knows how far we will go if we pursue our current ways."<br /><br />I could'nt stop thinking that no serious scientist would promote such a hare-brained idea, unless he worked for a think tank paid for by a fossil-fuels company, and then I found an article about the same speech, but written by Reuters instead of Agence France Presse.<br /><br /><a href="http://news.yahoo.com/s/nm/20060907/sc_nm/environment_civilization_dc"><strong>Climate change forged first civilizations: scientist</strong></a><br /><span style="font-size:85%;">NORWICH (Reuters) - The earliest civilizations were not a product of favorable conditions but rather a last resort in the face of dramatic shifts in the weather, a climate scientist said on Thursday.<br />Flying in the face of accepted theory that settled societies emerged from the development of static farming in good climatic conditions that produced food surpluses and allowed specialization, Nick Brooks said the opposite was true.<br />"Civilization did not arise as the result of a benign environment which allowed humanity to indulge a preference for living in complex, urban civilized societies," he told the annual meeting of the British Association for the Advancement of Science.</span><br /><p>Pretty similar no? but here is the last line in the Reuters article: </p><p><span style="font-size:85%;">And he warned against drawing comparisons with the global warming that is predicted to raise average temperatures by around three degrees this century, noting that the temperature rise was well above that which forced the societal change 5,000 years ago.</span> </p><p>It's not only what you read...but also where you read it. </p><p><a href="http://news.yahoo.com/s/nm/20060907/sc_nm/environment_life_dc">And, speaking of Dinosaurs...</a></p><p></p>El Zángano Azulhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03683664765367973291noreply@blogger.com5tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-20118843.post-1157428199561152412006-09-05T11:44:00.000-04:002006-09-05T11:59:01.886-04:00Josef Von Teufel: Bibliomancer, Visionary...Silly Man(so says The Blue Drone)<a href="http://photobucket.com" target="_blank"><img style="WIDTH: 440px; HEIGHT: 300px" height="544" alt="Photobucket - Video and Image Hosting" src="http://i108.photobucket.com/albums/n3/escueto/Picture054.jpg" width="522" border="0" /></a><br /><br />Greetings, adoring public and faithful followers of sideral bibliomancy. I have indeed returned to reveal truths and answer the questions that befuddle all. This week my fingers will caress the pages of XIX Century philosophy and guide your way towards fullness and happiness. And I will achieve this feat despite the fact that this <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Schopenhauer">mensch</a> was considered-though not entirely accurately-to be quite the pessimist. Those Germans, and their German ways...but in any case, let us proceed....<br /><br /><br /><strong>Aquarius</strong>(Jan 20-Feb 18)<br /><span style="font-size:85%;">"A good supply of resignation is of the first importance in providing for the journey of life. It is a supply which we shall have to extract from disappointed hopes; and the sooner we do it, the better for the rest of the journey."</span><br /><br />---<br />Your object of affection, I am sorry to say, does not love you back. Move on Aquarius, there are more fish in the sea...that will reject you. Also, Red Sox fans, give up! They're not even making the division championships this year.<br /><br /><strong>Pisces</strong>(Feb 19-Mar 20)<br /><span style="font-size:85%;">"In the sphere of thought, absurdity and perversity remain the masters of the world, and their dominion is suspended only for brief periods."</span><br /><br />---<br />And I suspect that in your case these periods only involve sleep. Cease to watch this "television" and read "Gossip magazines", lest you become an insufferable idiot.<br /><br /><strong>Aries</strong>(Mar 21-Apr 19)<br /><span style="font-size:85%;">"The actual life of a thought lasts only until it reaches the point of speech: there it petrifies and is henceforth dead but indestructible, like the petrified plants and animals of prehistory. As soon as our thinking has found words it ceases to be sincere or at bottom serious. When it begins to exist for others it ceases to live in us, just as the child severs itself from its mother when it enters into its own existence."</span><br /><br />---<br />Shut your trap, if you know what's good for you. Silence...is golden.<br /><span style="font-size:85%;"></span><br /><strong>Taurus</strong>(Apr 20-May 20)<br /><span style="font-size:85%;">"What makes us almost inevitably ridiculous is our serious way of treating the passing moment, as though it necessarily had all the importance which it seems to have. It is only a few great minds that are above this weakness, and, instead of being laughed at, have come to laugh themselves."</span><br /><br />---<br />It matters not that you have been laid off, slipped on a banana peel, then got hit by a car and suffered 4 compound fractures within a period of 30 minutes. Laugh, even if it is a Pyscho-homicidal laugh.<br /><br /><strong>Gemini</strong>(May 21-Jun 21)<br /><span style="font-size:85%;">"It is just because all happiness is of a negative character that, when we succeed in being perfectly at our ease, we are not properly conscious of it. Everything seems to pass us softly and gently, and hardly to touch us until the moment is over; and then it is the positive feeling of something lacking that tells us of the happiness which has vanished; it is then that we observe that we have failed to hold it fast, and we suffer the pangs of self-reproach as well as of privation."</span><br /><br />---<br />That's the feeling you get when you stop reading Josef Von Teufel's wise words.<br /><br /><strong>Cancer</strong>(Jun 22-Jul 22)<br /><span style="font-size:85%;">"Money is human happiness in the abstract: he, then, who is no longer capable of enjoying human happiness in the concrete devotes his heart entirely to money."<br /></span><br />---<br />Cancer, I care for your happiness in the concrete! Give away your wealth...to me! So as to purchase more, err...volumes of books, yes, that's the ticket.<br /><br /><br /><strong>Leo</strong>(Jul 22-Aug 22)<br /><span style="font-size:85%;">"Many undoubtedly owe their good fortune to the circumstance that they possess a pleasing smile with which they win hearts. Yet these hearts would do better to beware and to learn from Hamlet's tables that one may smile, and smile, and be a villain."</span><br /><br />---<br />She's faking it...you know, in bed.<br /><br /><strong>Virgo</strong>(Aug 23-Sep 22)<br /><span style="font-size:85%;">"Why should it be folly to be always intent on getting the greatest possible enjoyment out of the moment, which is our only sure possession? Our whole life is no more than a magnified present, and in itself as fleeting."</span><br />---<br />Great Outlook on life Virgo, you are a champion and a wise man and will go on to achieve great knowledge and fame. ahem!<br /><br /><strong>Libra</strong>(Sep 23-Oct 22)<br /><span style="font-size:85%;">"It is not without meaning that mythology depicts Cronus as devouring and digesting stones: for that which is otherwise quite indigestible, all affliction, vexation, loss, grief, time alone digests."</span><br /><br />---<br />You once tried to swallow and digest pride along with some heartache, with a side of dejection in a sweet mango sauce. Now had it not been for those stones you were passing you would have pulled it off. This is what you get for trying to imitate a Titan: Gastrointeritis Acuta.<br /><br /><strong>Scorpio</strong>(Oct 23-Nov 22)<br /><span style="font-size:85%;">"If you want to know how you really feel about someone take note of the impression an unexpected letter from him makes on you when you first see it on the doormat."</span><br /><br />---<br />True, but I still think you should reply to those 357 unread messages in your inbox.<br /><span style="font-size:85%;"></span><br /><strong>Sagittarius</strong>(Nov 23-Dec 21)<br /><span style="font-size:85%;">"Recognise the truth in yourself, recognise yourself in the truth; and in the same moment you will find, to your astonishment, that the home which you have long been looking for in vain, which has filled your most ardent dreams, is there in its entirety, with every detail of it true, in the very place where you stand. It is there that your heaven touches your earth."</span><br /><br />---<br />As your legal and spiritual counsel I advise you to follow this to the letter, mixed with some song and dance...aye.<br /><br /><strong>Capricorn</strong>(Dec 22-Jan 19)<br /><span style="font-size:85%;">"Marriage is a trap which nature sets for us"</span><br /><br />---<br />Ditto.<br /><br /><br />FINEl Zángano Azulhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03683664765367973291noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-20118843.post-1157126766641091492006-09-01T11:42:00.000-04:002006-09-01T12:06:07.673-04:00Ernesto, you let me down...againNot only did you fail-miserably by the way-to destroy Florida, but now you are intent on ruining my long weekend with your wind and rain. Now if you had been a real hurricane it would have been at least a bit interesting. But you are only a wimpy depression with lots of rain...meddlesome and irritating, just like a zit on the butt.<br /><img style="DISPLAY: block; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; CURSOR: hand; TEXT-ALIGN: center" alt="" src="http://photos1.blogger.com/blogger/2515/2005/400/Micasa.png" border="0" />All I have to say to you is this: I'm over you, and I don't love you anymore!El Zángano Azulhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03683664765367973291noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-20118843.post-1156953746648303592006-08-30T11:53:00.000-04:002006-08-30T23:59:15.680-04:00Ernesto, you let me down...<a href="http://photos1.blogger.com/blogger/2515/2005/1600/ernestito.jpg"><img style="DISPLAY: block; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; CURSOR: hand; TEXT-ALIGN: center" alt="" src="http://photos1.blogger.com/blogger/2515/2005/320/ernestito.jpg" border="0" /></a><br />If only you had been a Category 5 Hurricane, followed by wild-fires, followed by an earthquake, followed by a tsunami. Only then justice would have been served and Florida would have ceased to exist, to the benefit of humanity and the entire world. Insensitive, cruel?...allow me to elaborate, and ennumerate the main reasons justifying Florida's well deserved demise, and you shall understand, nay! You shall join the righteous camp! :<br /><br />1. <strong>"Gusanos"</strong>: derogatory term given to (mostly)wealthy Cuban emigrés who fled after the Cuban Revolution of 1959. Rabidly Anti-Castro, reactionary in most political debate. Now, I am no fan of "El Comandante", but through their well documented lobbying efforts they have made life for their fellow Cubans on the island far more miserable, knowingly or unknowingly. Well known to support conservative causes in the political sphere. And mainly responsible for...<br />2. <strong>George W. Bush</strong>: Due to the so-called 'mishandling' of the Elián González affair by the Clinton administration, and a fair degree of political maneuvering , most of the Cuban electorate in Florida supported George W. Bush in the 2000 election. We know the story from there. Who knows? Maybe the war in Iraq could have been averted.<br />3. <strong>Miami, The Capital of the Latino Entertainment Industry</strong>: Everyday, moronic, imbecilic programming is beamed to millions of households turning normal human beings into vapid, superficial lumpen. Takes the worst material from American and Latin Television and manages to make it even worse. Think 'Fox' without smart shows like the 'Simpsons' and more fake-news programs and brain-killing talk shows.<br />4. <strong>Disney World</strong>: Huge mega entertainment complexes designed to brainwash children...and adults into buying crap, and afterwards...buying more crap. People apparently move to Orlando to be closer to the Theme Parks, their Mecca. Off with their heads I say!<br />5. <strong>Florida looks ugly on a map</strong>: It's ungainly, and not pleasing to look at, extending like an unnecessary appendage towards the ocean, and disrupting the country's symmetry.<br /><br />If you have any relatives or loved ones living in Florida, please let them know that they should evacuate soon. Unless they're lumpen of course, then they should perish as well. For, if the Blue Drone has his way, and there any sort of Karmic Justice in the Universe, the area where Florida now lies shall then be known as the:<br /><br /><div align="center">Cuba-Georgia Passage!</div><br /><img style="DISPLAY: block; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; CURSOR: hand; TEXT-ALIGN: center" alt="" src="http://photos1.blogger.com/blogger/2515/2005/400/map-Florida-Cuba-esp.0.png" border="0" /><br />A safe haven for wildlife, free from the meddling of imbeciles. Perhaps in the future <a href="http://zanganoazul.blogspot.com/2006/08/what-is-going-on-in-rhode-island.html">Manatees will not need to look for food in Rhode Island</a>. And that, is a beautiful thought...El Zángano Azulhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03683664765367973291noreply@blogger.com6tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-20118843.post-1156889119313490992006-08-29T17:42:00.000-04:002006-08-29T18:05:19.370-04:00The Blue Drone gets hippie song stuck in head, forces it upon his unfortunate readers...Can't...get...it...out. Damn you McCartney!! Damn you!!<br /><br /><embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/jLPBxrhUb4A" width="425" height="350" type="application/x-shockwave-flash"></embed><br /><br />Why take advantage of my love for word-play?<br /><br /><span style="font-size:78%;">You say yes, I say no.</span><br /><span style="font-size:78%;">You say stop and I say go go go, oh no.</span><br /><span style="font-size:78%;">You say goodbye and I say hello</span><br /><span style="font-size:78%;">Hello hello</span><br /><span style="font-size:78%;">I don't know why you say goodbye, I say hello</span><br /><span style="font-size:78%;">Hello hello</span><br /><span style="font-size:78%;">I don't know why you say goodbye, I say hello.</span><br /><span style="font-size:78%;">I say high, you say low.</span><br /><span style="font-size:78%;">You say why and I say I don't know, oh no.</span><br /><span style="font-size:78%;">You say goodbye and I say hello</span><br /><span style="font-size:78%;">(Hello Goodbye Hello Goodbye) hello hello</span><br /><span style="font-size:78%;">(Hello Goodbye) I don't know why you say goodbye, I say hello</span><br /><span style="font-size:78%;">(Hello Goodbye Hello Goodbye) hello hello</span><br /><span style="font-size:78%;">(Hello Goodbye) I don't know why you say goodbye</span><br /><span style="font-size:78%;">(Hello Goodbye) I say hello.</span><br /><span style="font-size:78%;">Why why why why why why do you say goodbye goodbye, oh no?</span><br /><span style="font-size:78%;">You say goodbye and I say hello</span><br /><span style="font-size:78%;">Hello hello</span><br /><span style="font-size:78%;">I don't know why you say goodbye, I say hello</span><br /><span style="font-size:78%;">Hello hello</span><br /><span style="font-size:78%;">I don't know why you say goodbye, I say hello.</span><br /><span style="font-size:78%;">You say yes (I say "yes") </span><br /><span style="font-size:78%;">I say no (but I may mean no.)</span><br /><span style="font-size:78%;">You say stop (I can stay)</span><br /><span style="font-size:78%;"> and I say go go go (till it's time to go oh), oh no.</span><br /><span style="font-size:78%;">You say goodbye and I say hello</span><br /><span style="font-size:78%;">Hello helloI don't know why you say goodbye, I say hello</span><br /><span style="font-size:78%;">Hello helloI don't know why you say goodbye, I say Hello </span><br /><span style="font-size:78%;">Hello helloI don't know why you say goodbye, I say hello</span><br /><span style="font-size:78%;">hello.</span><br /><span style="font-size:78%;">Hela heba helloa </span><br /><br />I don't get the faux Hawaiian dancers...but it's still a beautiful song with a slight hint at melancholy, I feel. <br /><br />In any case, it doesn't make me a hippie-wimp. More angry agitprop will come later. When I'm good and ready.El Zángano Azulhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03683664765367973291noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-20118843.post-1156876377137630552006-08-29T12:40:00.000-04:002006-08-29T14:36:05.006-04:00What is going on in Rhode Island?<div align="left"><br /><a href="http://photos1.blogger.com/blogger/2515/2005/1600/playatropical.jpg"><img style="CURSOR: hand" height="194" alt="" src="http://photos1.blogger.com/blogger/2515/2005/200/playatropical.jpg" width="200" border="0" /></a> <a href="http://photos1.blogger.com/blogger/2515/2005/1600/rhode-island.1.gif"><img style="CURSOR: hand" alt="" src="http://photos1.blogger.com/blogger/2515/2005/200/rhode-island.1.png" border="0" /></a><br />Last time I checked, a lush tropical paradise it was not. So how can this be explained?:<br /><br /><a href="http://news.yahoo.com/s/ap/20060825/ap_on_sc/tropical_fish">More tropical fish sighted in R.I. water </a><br /><span style="font-size:85%;">NEWPORT, R.I. - An unusually large number of tropical fish have been spotted this summer in Rhode Island waters by divers, fishermen and environmentalists.<br />Among the fish seen so far: juvenile orange filefish, snowy grouper and lookdowns. A local lobsterman pulled up a large trigger fish in one of his traps.<br />"We're always catching tropicals during the summer months, but I mean there are a lot more. Probably about double the amount," Jean Bambara, an aquarist at Save the Bay's Exploration Center in Newport, told The Providence Journal.<br /></span><br /><a href="http://abcnews.go.com/Technology/wireStory?id=2340152">Endangered Manatee Spotted Off R.I.</a><br /><span style="font-size:85%;">WARWICK, R.I. Aug 21, 2006 (AP)— An endangered manatee made a rare appearance in Rhode Island waters during the weekend, a state marine biologist said.<br />The manatee was seen Sunday in Greenwich Bay off the coast of Warwick. The large marine mammals are usually found only in the warm waters of Florida and the Carolinas. The animal was not spotted Monday.<br />Manatees eat salt marsh grass, algae and seaweed, said April Valliere, a state marine biologist. Water temperatures have been unusually warm, she said, which probably allowed the manatee to follow food sources so far north.<br /></span><br />Hard to believe that there are still some who consider climate change and global warming a fallacy. What's next I ask? What next?<br /><br /><br /></div><img style="DISPLAY: block; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; CURSOR: hand; TEXT-ALIGN: center" alt="" src="http://photos1.blogger.com/blogger/2515/2005/320/iceberg%20beach.jpg" border="0" /> <p align="center">This?!</p><p> </p><p>Related Post <a href="http://zanganoazul.blogspot.com/2006/03/in-memoriam-circa-10000-ac-2002-ad.html">here</a>(with music!). </p>El Zángano Azulhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03683664765367973291noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-20118843.post-1155313014787915132006-08-11T11:49:00.000-04:002006-08-11T12:16:54.943-04:00Ultimate Physicist Fighting Championship<a href="http://photos1.blogger.com/blogger/2515/2005/1600/einsteinrie.0.jpg"><img style="WIDTH: 103px; CURSOR: hand; HEIGHT: 139px" height="137" alt="" src="http://photos1.blogger.com/blogger/2515/2005/400/einsteinrie.jpg" width="97" border="0" /></a> <a href="http://photos1.blogger.com/blogger/2515/2005/1600/Bohr.jpg"><img style="CURSOR: hand" alt="" src="http://photos1.blogger.com/blogger/2515/2005/320/Bohr.jpg" border="0" /></a><br /><br />-Albert Einstein: "God does not play dice with the universe"<br /><br />-Niels Bohr: "Who is Einstein to tell the Lord what to do?"<br /><br />Though the debate originally mainly concerned quantum physics, its metaphysical & even theological implications are unavoidable.<br /><br />What do you think, my esteemed readers? Does God roll Dice? At the casino? By the alley? At the Rotary Club on Sundays while nursing a warm Budweiser?<br /><br />Related reading <a href="http://www.bbc.co.uk/sn/tvradio/programmes/horizon/einstein_symphony_prog_summary.shtml">here</a>...& <a href="http://speakingoffaith.publicradio.org/programs/einsteinsgod/transcript.shtml">here</a>.<br /><br />I'll be reciting the mantra below...see if it gives me guidance.El Zángano Azulhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03683664765367973291noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-20118843.post-1155307663477262012006-08-11T10:26:00.000-04:002006-08-11T10:57:40.736-04:00The Blue Drone gets spammed...likes it.<a href="http://photos1.blogger.com/blogger/2515/2005/1600/spammy.jpg"><img style="CURSOR: hand" alt="" src="http://photos1.blogger.com/blogger/2515/2005/200/spammy.jpg" border="0" /></a> <a href="http://photos1.blogger.com/blogger/2515/2005/1600/mantra.jpg"><img style="CURSOR: hand" alt="" src="http://photos1.blogger.com/blogger/2515/2005/200/mantra.jpg" border="0" /></a><br /><br />Spam was delivered to the Blue Drone's Work Inbox this morning. After a very brief moment of annoyance, he noticed a series words below a link offering special prices on imitation designer wristwatches. The Blue Drone scoffs at time-keeping devices; time is but an invention of puny little humans and betrays their petty little ambitions of futilely making schedules and re-organizing omnipresent chaos. I chortle at them! And I'll bend time just to toy with their perceptions!<br />Yet...the words that followed, albeit apparently random, trascended any faux-marketer's bottom line:<br /><span style="font-size:85%;"></span><br /><span style="font-size:85%;">ink sac low-living team boatcharity school quasi cultivation treasury warrant two-rowed set up short-distance sea wand queen cat mountain foxtail drain repairer Basonga-mina silk mercer towel gourd pock-fretten soul-wounding gaming contract powder flask filly-folly sapta-matri right-angle drop stitch</span><br /><span style="font-size:85%;"></span><br />I found myself reading them over and over again, until they almost had the tone and melody of a mantra. I certainly will repeat the words this evening, hoping that it will at least help with my insomnia and send me to slumber...or make me purchase a fake Louis Vuitton bag.El Zángano Azulhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03683664765367973291noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-20118843.post-1154975553728699582006-08-07T14:27:00.000-04:002006-08-07T14:32:33.756-04:00The Blue Drone takes a picture of a picture...<div align="center"><a href="http://photos1.blogger.com/blogger/2515/2005/1600/Picture%20052.jpg"><img style="DISPLAY: block; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; CURSOR: hand; TEXT-ALIGN: center" alt="" src="http://photos1.blogger.com/blogger/2515/2005/320/Picture%20052.jpg" border="0" /></a><br />Philadelphia, PA. Saturday August 5, 2006. 1:24 p.m.</div>El Zángano Azulhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03683664765367973291noreply@blogger.com5tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-20118843.post-1154970709862677042006-08-07T12:55:00.000-04:002006-08-07T14:15:12.943-04:00Tales...Quotes...I was reading a short story by my friend <a href="http://viudabella.blogspot.com">Viudabella</a> yesterday...you should go read it(En español), good noirish tale...which reminded me a bit of the <a href="http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0041959/">Third Man</a>, which in turn reminded me of its most famous quote by the character played by Orson Welles, who while still not fat and kooky like we all love him, was well on his way. It went a little something like this:<br /><br />"Don't be so gloomy. After all it's not that awful. Like the fella says, in Italy for 30 years under the Borgias they had warfare, terror, murder, and bloodshed, but they produced Michelangelo, Leonardo da Vinci, and the Renaissance. In Switzerland they had brotherly love - they had 500 years of democracy and peace, and what did that produce? The cuckoo clock. "<br /><br />A bit disturbing, yet it contains a grain of truth. Case in point: Sweden. A country that save for Ingmar Bergman has only produced very very awful pop music bands...and IKEA.El Zángano Azulhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03683664765367973291noreply@blogger.com0